Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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