But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
