Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Randomize