All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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