you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
