okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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