I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i think i have two assholes
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize