is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
and she was petting her beer can
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
