Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
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We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
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i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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