It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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