yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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