I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
