and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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