I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I'm jealous of your bromance
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
