Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
