You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
