I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
