She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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