"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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