May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I think a kid would responsible me up
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
