Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
