And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Randomize
