I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
