'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Randomize
