i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
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