ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
