Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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