I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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