Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
