belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
