I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
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Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
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By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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