jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.