so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize