ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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