ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
