Midget sex pt 2 tonight
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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