My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
