yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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