wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You may now shotgun with the bride
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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