I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
