I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
My vagina is officially offended.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize