Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
It's official drugs can't kill me
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
