I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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