that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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