I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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