they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
