I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
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