Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
