if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
