If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
