Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
he laminated a picture of his dick.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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