Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Dick very happy bro
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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